Colorado Conservative

Hysterical

Zombyboy at Resurrection Song sent me here...you go...you go now.  Here's the headline...

Underwater bike ride to launch students' eight-week crime spree

The Littlest Violin...The Churchill Saga Continues

From the Boulder Daily Camera...

University of Colorado professors, even those who have nothing to do with Ward Churchill, say they're feeling "beaten up."

The lightning-rod professor ignited controversy with an essay on the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001. He's also under fire for allegations of academic fraud and taking a shortcut to tenure.

Calls by lawmakers for his dismissal and an examination of tenure have other faculty members saying their own freedom of speech — and their reputations — are threatened.

"It's tarnishing everyone else's image," said education professor Margaret LeCompte, who signed a full-page ad in today's Daily Camera supporting academic freedom.

The controversy over Churchill is "distracting us enormously from what we are supposed to be doing here, which is teaching and research," said history professor Susan Kent, who serves as associate vice chancellor for faculty affairs.

So what do these professors do to stop from feeling "beat up" and "being distracted"?  They sign a petition to stop the hearings into Ward Churchill.

I've got a better idea.  Help get this guy removed.  Unless of course you, as a professor, support a colleague who plagiarizes and misrepresents himself, who takes swings at reporters, and steals art and claims it as his own.  If you think this is how an honorable professor should act, by all means stand behind him. 

If, however, you earn your credentials, did the work you say you did, and didn't engage in plagiarism, you would be best served if Ward Churchill was no longer a member of the University of Colorado staff.  It's Ward Churchill, not the hearing into his actions that is the problem.  It's too bad 200 of the professors at C.U. don't get that.

Bad News For Dan Rather

Metro Networks has a story about what some of his colleagues thin of him...

As CBS anchor Dan Rather winds down his career, he now knows how some of his peers really feel about him.  According to the "New York Daily News," some of his CBS colleagues say they don't watch the anchor's "CBS Nightly News.  "60 Minutes" correspondent Mike Wallace says he doesn't find Rather easy to watch and that Rather is uptight and occasionally contrived.  Legendary anchor Walter Cronkite says Rather looks like he is, quote, "showboating," or playing the part of a reporter on TV.  Andy Rooney says he believes Rather broadcasts from the road so often because he's ashamed of anchoring, quote, "a dumb job."  And "60 Minutes" creator Don Hewitt says America is voting against Rather with its remote controls.  Rather's last time in the anchor desk will be March 9th after a 24-year career.  He's retiring a year sooner than he wanted after his September "Memogate" story on President Bush's Air National Guard service.

Ouch, that's gotta hurt.

More Good News From The Middle East

Bulletin from Metro Networks..

Lebanon's pro-Syrian prime minister says the nation's entire government will resign.  Prime Minister Omar Karami has been under pressure since the assassination of former Prime Minister Rafik al-Hariri two weeks ago.  Parliament was discussing the assassination today and had been expected to close with a no-confidence vote in the government.  But after a lunch break, Karami took the podium and said, quote, "Out of concern that the government does not become an obstacle to the good of the country, I announce the resignation of the government I had the honor to lead."

Seems to me like this is good news....stemming, of course, from that pesky little action in Iraq.  You know the one...that one that got rid of Saddam Hussein, and let the Iraqi people vote....that one.

When Sperm Goes....um...Bad

Stolen sperm is causing controversy in Illinois. A woman accused of using stolen sperm from her lover and impregnating herself with it can be held liable for emotional damage suffered by the father.  A ruling last week by an appeals court said physician Sharon Irons of Olympia Fields betrayed Chicago doctor Richard Phillips.  The court reinstated part of a lawsuit which was originally dismissed two years ago by a circuit court.  The lawsuit was filed by Phillips and claims Irons kept some of Phillips' semen without his knowledge, used it to impregnate herself, then filed a paternity suit against him.

That's what happens when you leave sperm lying around, it gets stolen and comes back to haunt you.  So kiddies, remember, if you're not going to use your sperm, either put it away or get rid of it.  YOu'll save yourself a lot of hassle.

UPDATE: Drew from Conservative Friends suggests I should dig a little deeper into the story.  I did, and it gets way more interesting...

If a woman performs oral sex on a man, leaves the room, secretly uses that sperm to impregnate herself, then sues the man for child support, is that "extreme and outrageous" conduct?

Yes it is, the Illinois Appellate Court ruled this week.

The justices said Chicago doctor Richard Phillips can try to convince a jury that his ex-fiancee pulled that trick on him, causing him emotional distress.

The ex-fiancee, Sharon Irons, also a doctor, says Phillips got her pregnant the old-fashioned way -- sexual intercourse -- and concocted the oral sex story as a novel excuse to get out of paying child support for their 5-year-old daughter.

I didn't know you could do that...I mean...ummm...keep semen in your mouth.  If she did indeed do this, I believe Phillips should win his lawsuit.  That's just not right.

Wrong All Around

From Metro Networks..

An Ohio mother is in some serious trouble after allegations she attacked a school principal.  Raynetta Langford was called to Harry E. Davis Elementary School in Cleveland when her seven-year-old daughter broke policy by going inside the school before classes started.  Principal Sherree Ray says Langford pushed her and kicked her in the face while the two were on the ground.

I don't advocate attacking the principal.  The mother should be prosecuted, BUT what kind of policy does a school have where kids have to stand outside and wait.  I don't understand why it's better to leave kids outside to their own devices, rather than let them come in to a certain part of the school.  Dumb policy.

A Question For The University Of Colorado and Ward Churchill

When I saw this obvious copy by Ward Churchill, and noting Churchill's having been accused of plagiarism, I have one question for the University of Colorado....

How can you possibly punish any student for plagiarism or fail a student for not doing adequate research on a topic?  The University can't.  A school must hold itself to the same standards it expects from its students.  C.U. obviously has very low standards when it comes to enforcing academic fraud and research.  In fact, they seem to be rewarding that kind of behavior and poor scholarship.  Pity they don't hold themselves to the same standards to which they hold their students.  If I was a student at C.U. I would be outraged.

WalMart Worker Reject Union

This makes me smile....

Workers at a Wal-Mart Tire & Lube Express voted 17-1 against union representation today, rejecting efforts to establish what would have been the first union inside any Wal-Mart store in the United States.

A spokesman for the United Food and Commercial Workers who announced the outcome said the group will ask the National Labor Relations Board to throw the results out, saying no union member was allowed to observe the election and Wal-Mart added employees to the unit to dilute the strength of the union supporters.

I love it!  The worker trounce the union and the union says the results were flawed.  Dude, the union lost 17 - 1...that was no dilution, that was a rout!  Get over it, and go somewhere else to spout your dated union schtick.

What The......

A Metro Networks story...

The New Jersey chapter of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals says it will start a boycott of the Kraft company if they don't pull their Trolli Road Kill Gummi candies off of store shelves.  The fruit flavored chicken, squirrel and snake shaped candies are flat with tire marks through their backs.  A spokesman for the ASPCA says the candy sends the wrong message.  They say there is nothing funny about animals that have been hit by cars and trucks.  The ASPCA spokesman says his organization will start a letter writing campaign, and even call for a boycott of Kraft products if the gummi candies continue to be sold.

I may be callous, but it's a little late to be worrying about animals once they're in the condition represented by the candy.  Worry about animals still alive please.  That's seems more helpful.

Oh yeah, and one more thing...IT'S CANDY!!!!! Lighten up a little...

He May Be A Justice, But He's Still An Idiot

From the Metro Networks browser....

It seems like nobody is immune to crime, even a Supreme Court justice.  Justice Terrence O'Donnell of the Ohio Supreme Court says someone broke into his state-owned car last week and took and 18-thousand-dollars in cash as well as other valuables.  Police in Cleveland say the car was parked on the west bank of an area known as The Flats, where an increasing number of car break-ins have been reported.  Cleveland police officers have begun patrolling the area more regularly.

I'm sorry, I don't care if you're a Supreme Court justice or a blind orange peeler, why in the world are you keeping 18-thousand dollars in a parked car?  Especially in an area that has been seeing an increase in car break-ins.  Not very smart.