Colorado Conservative

A Needless Law

From Metro Networks...

Residents in the northern Italian town of Turin will soon be under orders to walk their pets.  According to the "La Stampa" daily newspaper, a new law is about to be passed by the city council that would impose a fine of up to 650-dollars on animal owners who don't walk their pets at least three times a day.  While that may sound pretty straight forward, the rules are actually quite specific.  They state that while dogs can be led for walks by people on bicycles, such walks must not be done in a way that, quote, "would tire the animal too much."  Once approved, the measure will also bar people from dyeing their pets' fur or having any type of so-called "animal mutilation'' performed solely for aesthetic purposes.

I wonder if these folks wrote this law just so they could get some press attention.  My cats, needless to say, will not be getting wlaked three times a day no matter where they live.

It Tastes Like Chicken

Betty Manion says she got a lot more than she ordered at the Gemini Restaurant in Wheat Ridge, Colorado.  Manion ordered the Bombay Salad last month and claims she found a dead mouse in it.  She has bad eyesight so she asked a friend what it was that her fork had hit.  Her friend said it was a rodent.  The restaurant's owner doesn't know how a mouse could get into a salad and points out the place is fumigated every week.  Manion says she's upset that the restaurant never apologized for the incident, which happened as she was celebrating her birthday.

Once again.....Yuck!!  And near where I live even.....

What The....?

From Metro Networks...

Some pretty bizarre things went on at a Virginia Wal-Mart recently.  A man urinated on a woman as she was shopping in the children's bicycles section of the Fredericksburg store.  She told authorities she was looking at the bikes when she felt an odd feeling on the back of her leg.  She then saw a man exposed and peeing on her.  Police are concerned this behavior could escalate into something more serious and are checking out store security equipment to try to find out who the man is.

More serious than peeing on someone?  I'm not sure what that could be, but I'm not sure I WANT to know either.  Yuck!

GO NUGGETS!!!!

A long way to go in the playoffs, but this is a great start!

Turn Off The Light Or Else

A scary story from Metro Networks...

An Indian paratrooper bit off part of his roommate's nose this week after an argument over turning off the light.  Police say the incident happened Wednesday while the two soldiers were in their barracks.  They say when one soldier wanted to keep the lights on for a few more minutes the other soldier became enraged, pinned him down, and proceeded to bite off part of his nose.  Authorities say when people who rushed to help the screaming man, he was bleeding heavily, while his attacker stood in the corner with blood all over his lips.  The soldier who was bitten was taken to the hospital and doctors reattached the flesh to his nose. The biter was arrested. 

I think I would have done what the guy asked.....and got a new roommate.

This Shouldn't Be Funny...But It Is

From Metro Networks...

Unruly wild turkeys are causing problems for residents in Cranford, New Jersey.  The Cranford police department says a 13-year-old girl was chased by a pack of the wild birds at the beginning of the month.  In another incident, a letter carrier was forced to kill a bird with a stick when a group of turkeys surrounded his truck.  Police also are fielding calls about other attacks.  The incidents are happening in residential neighborhoods that border wooded areas.  The area humane society is dealing with the problem.  Some of the birds are four-feet tall and can fly as fast a 55 miles-an-hour.

Yes, you can stop laughing now....but think about how scary it would be to have a bunch of four foot tall birds chasing you and looking for blood...Not exactly Alfred Hitchcock, but pretty scary.  I can see the movie now

Night of the Turkeys

The "Jerry Springer" Penguin

The life of Zurita the penguin at the Brookfield Zoo in the Chicago suburbs is making headlines because her plight is typical of many single moms.  She is successfully raising a chick on her own.  The zoo mated Zurita with a younger penguin named Gazpacho.  But instead of life long bliss, Gazpacho headed out for greener pastures, leaving Zurita to care for the egg on her own and built a nest by herself.   The chick is still unnamed and is 102 days old.

I'm sure after you read this...you'll feel sorry for Zurita, and not just because she was mated with a cold soup....but there's another side to this sordid story...

Normally, penguins mate for life in a 50-50 partnership.  The male penguin even takes turns sitting on the egg to keep it warm during the 42-day incubation period, which allows the female to stretch, eat and do other things.  Zurita has had a hard life.  After her mate died died in 2000, Zurita went looking for another mate.  She tried stealing male penguins away from other female penguins, leading to some violent altercations.  Once her chick is self sufficient, Zurita will be moved to the Milwaukee County Zoo where a single male awaits her.

Oh, so Zurita is a husband stealer....and she is prone to violence...and now she's a single mom.....and now she's heading out of state.

I tell ya, Jerry Springer is calling ole' Zurita right now

When Animals Go...Bad

From Metro Networks...

Things really stink inside downtown Baltimore's Mitchell Courthouse building and it may be due to decaying rodents.  According to the "Baltimore Sun," a stench is working its way through hallways, jury rooms and courtrooms in the 105-year-old building's second and third floors.  Things have gotten so bad that a judge recently apologized for what he termed as the "environmental factors" of jury duty.  While some think it's due to rodents, the building's maintenance crew and others haven't yet positively identified the odor's source.

Not the best working conditions, but this isn't isolated...

Authorities in Pennsylvania are trying to figure out how a bag stuffed with rotting animal parts got behind a ceiling tile.  The "Express Times" reports that a stench led to the bizarre discovery in Voorhees High School's cafeteria and Lebanon Township police are investigating the case.  The bag was uncovered on Monday and the speculation is that it was stashed there over the weekend.  The school was shut down and the cafeteria will not serve food until the all clear is given by the county's health board.

Ohhhh....Kayyyyy....Now for some breakfast..

This Cracks Me Up

A Pot Rally at the University of Colorado goes on against all odds...

An annual pot-smoking rally on the University of Colorado campus Wednesday was all smoke and showers.

First, CU officials unleashed the sprinkler system, dousing the hundreds of students who had ignored orders to stay off Farrand Field.

Doused but undeterred, several dozen in the heart of the crowd lit up their marijuana cigarettes, creating a small white cloud above the soggy green grass.

To cap things off, the slate gray sky opened up and let loose with rain and, later, some pea-sized hail.

Some got stoned. Most got soaked.

"I think it was very funny," said one of the tokers, who identified himself only as Dave. "First they tried to get us with the sprinklers and then it rains. We were going to get wet anyway.

I'm just shocked that the stoners were so determined...that or they just didn't feel like getting up and going somewhere else.

Where To Go To Be Hip

If you're interested in the latest Space Age Bachelor Pad A Go-Go type music, you really should go here...